Confidence

Confidence blog post dushilifestyle

Being confident

I’ve written about confidence before but it was in a post where I talked about lots of other things too. Remember me telling you that becoming more confident would be my new thing? Did this happen??? No cliffhanger here, so here is the answer and the answer is NO!!! 😓 The pressure to start being more confident and to just go for things is getting worse. As of now, I have about 45 days to get a new job—just a quick reminder in case you missed last week’s post. Having 45 days at this job is not because they want to get rid of me but because of my need to continue with my journey to happiness.

Doubts

After almost 6 months my friend stress is back and she says: “Hello!”  Is it the right thing to do to just stay where I am? At least I know I will have an income but I won’t be moving forward with my plans and dreams? Or should I stop doubting myself and just apply for the jobs that appeal to me and stop being so scared and having so many doubts? But by leaving having a steady income is off the table again.  As always I save money for the just-in-case part but I don’t want to touch my savings to pay the bills. The biggest part of this journey is to be more confident and just doing things without doubting myself so much. 

IT Event 

Another part of this journey is doing more things alone and to step out of my comfort zone so I got a ticket to an IT event. You might think what the hell and where is this coming from? This has always been an interest of mine but I never knew what my options were. When lurking on LinkedIn  (as one does to look for job opportunities) A friend of mine posted about this event. It said that you are welcome without an IT background. If you are interested and want to know more about the opportunities in IT. As I am writing this I feel nervous because I am going alone and this is a whole new setting for me. I hope that I am not going to change my mind and cancel. If I go I will let you know how it went. 

Time out 

I am going away next week to Curacao and I am looking forward to this just to clear my mind. I am hoping that by being in another environment, things will start falling into place. The way my mind is running around in circles is very annoying and I am hoping that the sun and the beach will inspire me and make me happy. I need this time out to reset my mind. I am so grateful that I get to do this because I know that not everybody can change environments to reset their minds. 

Book recommendation

Reading books is one of the things that I love doing. There is a book, that I want to read Girl Stop Apologizing. They say it’s a wake-up call book for women. It talks about how we must stop making excuses and doubting ourselves and just go after our dreams. I will buy it for my upcoming vacation.I will let you know if it is a must-read. This has been a short and sweet post. I don’t have much to talk about this week. I am stressed about work and about packing my suitcase. I don’t like packing. My little sister packs in two minutes and looks cute every day. I pack for two weeks and still have nothing to wear. I want to be her when I grow up. ☺️

What do you think?

Let me know what you think I should do about the work. Should I stay longer or just go once my contract is done? 🙃You can let me know here, on Facebook or on Instagram.  Talk to you next week

Keeping up With Friendships

Why am I like this?

You know the older you get the more people you got to know over the years. I have met some wonderful people due to jobs I had or just people I have met through other people. I have been thinking about some of them lately and I don’t know why. I always think of random things at random times of the day. You might think where am I going with this? Well, I am the type of person who for example hears a mosquito in the middle of the night, wakes up and Googles how long does a mosquito live? Why do I do this?? Nobody knows!! But anyway back to the story. So basically that’s how my brain works and that’s why I have been thinking about some of them out of nowhere.

Disappointed

So these last few months I have been randomly thinking about a few of them at the most ridiculous hours of the day. Instead of me texting them I go onto their Facebook (yes I am old and I still check Facebook), IG, TikTok, etc. to see if everything is ok and then I go on with my day. The easiest thing would be to just call or text them to say hi. The thing is I feel awkward just saying hi out of the blue because I feel like they might be disappointed in me for not staying in touch.  I live in my little bubble and especially during fall and winter I just can’t go out and socialize. I just work and go home. The thought of having plans in this weather is a big no for me. 

Socializing

I wish I was better at this whole socializing thing. I know some people who always have busy schedules. They have plans with this person and that person and I just get mentally tired of just hearing how busy they are.  Sometimes I fall into this trap of enthusiasm and say oooh yes we need to get together soon and when soon comes you are already thinking of excuses to not go. I used to do this a lot when I was younger. These days I just keep it real and say that I am sorry but that it has nothing to do with them and that I just don’t feel like leaving my house.

Keeping up with friendships

Life is so busy sometimes that I don’t have the energy to be keeping up with friendships. And let’s be honest I am sometimes too lazy or too tired to talk to people. At this point in my life, I am so busy with figuring my life out that when I am done wrecking my brain all day with what is your next step going to be Indy??? You need to figure things out like yesterday. After this “wonderful” daily interaction with myself, I just want to be on my couch and watch movies. Energy is done!

Podcast about Friendship

As always I am either watching or listening to a Podcast and these girls from The Receipts podcast were talking about friendships. Have a listen to their podcast. They are so much fun. I do think that most women would like them but who knows maybe a few of my guy readers would too. If I was a guy I would listen to them to learn how women’s minds work hahaha. I have linked the episode about friendships and how they sometimes change. 

Feeling Bad

After writing this whole thing and reading it back I do feel awful that I don’t talk to certain people more often. I hope that they know that I am there for them whenever they need me. I am going to try and keep in touch with a few of them. How are you guys with friendships? Do you speak to everybody regularly? Let me know in the comments on this platform, Instagram or Facebook. 

Talk to ya next week 🙂 

Keeping up with friends

I am ready for my next season.

How to start over after 40? (part 100 or something)

I have been binge-watching YouTube these days, especially on the topic of how to get your life together, how to find your passion, and how to start over after 40. I will link a few of the creators that I liked at the end of this post. Of course, I can’t entirely agree with everything they say but I always write down what I can apply to my life and go from there. There were a few good tips.

My algorithm is working overtime cause now they are sending me suggestions on how to get rich in 1 month. I guess even YouTube is sensing how “desperate” I am becoming about how to fix my life.LOL!!!

Complaining

I didn’t want to write this post because I feel like I am complaining again and this is not the message I want to send. If you are reading this please know that I am not complaining it’s just that life doesn’t fix itself within a week. I wish it did but unfortunately, it doesn’t. I got so many nice messages from last week’s post. So many people can relate to how we are done with winter and with the fact that most of us don’t even know what we are doing. Most of us are trying to figure things out.

Feeling anxious again

I have noticed that I wake up feeling anxious again from time to time and I don’t like it. I haven’t had that feeling for 7 months now. I slept so well these past 7 months but as I said in my previous post I think this is because I need to start thinking about my next step. March is approaching and my contract is done by the end of May. 

Ready for my next season

I know I want to do something else next but the question is WHAT?????? Why can’t I wake up one day and have this lightbulb moment? I am so jealous of people who know what their path in life is. I am ready to skip to the next season of my life. This season is done and we are ready to see what is going to happen next. 

Being kind to myself

I am trying to be kind to myself and see every small step as an accomplishment because I always want to go from 0 to 100 without taking the steps in between. Being like this means that I usually quit something because I don’t get the results quickly enough. Also, I am very much afraid of failure. Although I am afraid of failure, there is some good news because I am almost done with this PR course I am doing. I have started so many of these at-home courses but never finished any of them. So I am very pleased to say that I am almost done with this one. My grades are good and I am happy about that.

Starting with a new course

Now that I am almost done with this one I have applied for an SEO course. I want to learn more about how Google works and how you can get your business higher in these google rankings. I realized that I like this due to this writing of mine. I want more people to read the blog and to reach this goal I need to learn how keywords work etc. I also one day hope to have my own business so it’s valuable information.

Accepting help

I also need to stop being so “shy” and start asking people to repost my blog so more people will read it. My friends always tell me to tag them so they can repost but I always feel like I am asking too much. I don’t want to bother anyone with my things. I need to stop feeling like this because they want to help me reach my goals.

Ramble 

Of course, this post didn’t make any sense again but low-key it did. I have decided to accept that my posts are just about anything and everything that is going on in my life. I try to do topics and stick to them but sometimes it is just nice to just ramble. I think that I need to make rambling my niche.😌

Links 

Here are the links to a few YouTube creators that I listened to/ watched this past week. I also listen to some podcasts. I will list them in another post.

https://www.youtube.com/@aliabdaal

https://www.youtube.com/@LynAllure

https://www.youtube.com/@Alexissparks

Anyway, I hope that you enjoyed yet another post that was all over the place. If you are someone who does know what they want can you let me know how you got to that point? I would love to hear it. You can comment here, on my Facebook page, or on my Instagram.

Talk to ya next week 🙂

I am ready for my next season

So some news to share

As you may have noticed I haven’t posted last week because I was on auntie duty. The best job in the world. I had to babysit my little nephew cause he had a bit of a cold and wasn’t feeling well. I was too busy enjoying the cuddles and kisses when he was ill cause now that he’s getting older he doesn’t have time to give me all the kisses and hugs anymore. So when he had his cold he was all hugs, kisses and cuddles whilst watching cartoons and I enjoyed ever minute. 

So now back to this week. I told myself last night that I am going to be productive this week and made a list. I am almost done with that list for today and I am proud because we all know the I am going to start Monday list and eventually do nothing that is on that list. Conclusion Monday is gone and we tell ourselves well we’ll start again next week. 

Anyway you have read the title and after 4 months of enjoying my freedom I am going to start a new job next Monday. It’s going to be a struggle getting up early and going to bed on time because my life didn’t have any structure at all. Which was fun and if I was rich I could live like that forever 🙂 

I am a little bit excited to see how I am going to like this one. It has a little bit to do with education but I don’t have to teach. I am going to help students with their work and make sure they get a diploma after 7 months. During my time at home I realized that I did like the coaching of students but not standing in front of a class and being a cop instead of a teacher. It’s a job for about 7 months to a year. I like this because if I don’t like it I get to start over with something new next year. This gives me freedom again. The plan is to save money again and see where life is going to take me I 2023. I still want to travel and maybe live somewhere else in the long run but first let’s go make some money.

I will keep you guys posted and if I like the job and my new colleagues. During my job interview I did like the vibe of the place so we shall see. 

Bye bye freedom and hello back to work and some structure.